Trans men in lesbian spaces, micro identities, label shenanigan
Sorry for talking about LGBTQ discourse, but I am interested.
The Twitter discourse surrounding trans men in lesbian spaces is interesting, to say the least. It might sound too Anglo-centric, but the idea that a butch lesbian who transitions into a man/transmasc and still wants to be in lesbian spaces because they have an attachment to the community and feel deeply connected to the label on a personal level does make sense, and it's not hard to see this happen in a lot of regions.
It's like some trans women who still use the femboy label or hang around femboy spaces or gay male spaces because they used to be part of those.
This isn't to insinuate that trans men are women or trans women are men, but I think it's more of a "hey, I used to be a skater but I don't skate anymore because I'm a biker now, but I still have an attachment to the skater community and like to call myself one" kind of thing.
Some people might disagree, but we're talking about individuals who have lived experience with that identity and have a personal attachment because of it, so I don't think it's fair for us to police them.
I know the lesbian case is a delicate topic, because the idea of including men in lesbian spaces does sound iffy. However, a trans man or transmasc person who used to be a lesbian and is still in lesbian spaces is different from a cishet man trying to enter lesbian spaces. The latter usually harasses lesbians or acts in lesbophobic ways. I'm a lesbian myself, and I'm sure we can tell the difference between fellow queer people who used to be part of another queer identity and are still in our spaces out of camaraderie or personal attachment, versus non-queer people trying to get into our spaces because they want to be an ass toward us.
That aside, this whole thing is also kind of a nothingburger, because at the end of the day, trans men who use the lesbian label or exist in lesbian spaces are a minuscule group to begin with. But of course, Twitter lesbians (which are mostly crypto radfems) try to turn this into a bigger boogeyman than it is (just like they did with bi lesbians or he/him lesbians) when these are small minorities and, again, still fellow queer people.
This whole label discourse and micro-identity discourse really makes me think there's a divide between "baby queer" and older queer people. I feel like most older queer people tend to be inclusionist and don't really care much what identity another queer person uses to describe themselves. Maybe because older queer people in the past tended to be tight-knit, since they were closeted and it was hard to form big communities. So they just welcomed fellow LGBTQ people into their own, despite identities sometimes contradicting strict label definitions. I mean, in the end, homophobic society would still see them as degenerate sexual deviants anyway, so why bother?
Meanwhile, baby queer people can more easily find community now and can be openly queer, so I think labels feel more important to them.
So I think there's a disconnect between the two generations. Part of me thinks it might have to do with younger queer people not being taught queer history . So they have to seek it out themselves, if they're even interested. And most queer history is locked away in academic spaces, which makes it inaccessible.
And like I said before, LGBTQ issues in modern times are still fairly juvenil, and naturally there will be a lot more discord and new identities, new forms of queerness being born. For me, it feels like LGBTQ communities want to put people into neat labeled boxes, but at the same time, most LGBTQ people don't want to be put into boxes — especially since many individuals have different experiences within their own queerness, shaped by different circumstances. Not to mention this obsession with labels having to be prescriptive.
IMO, I think you can't be prescriptive about people's experiences with gender and sexuality, because a lot of the time their experiences might differ from the label's definition. Labels should be used as a tool, not as a master. A label is just there to communicate your identity to people, it doesn't necessarily mean your experience is the same as everyone else's who uses it. It's hard to put this into words, and I wish I knew how to explain it better, but for example: there's a girl who feels she's not attracted to people sexually or romantically, but she does have homosexual tendencies. So when people ask about her identity, "acearo lesbian" is the perfect label. But some people might find that weird, like, "she's not sexually or romantically attracted to women, so why is she a lesbian?"
This is why I'm saying labels should only be a tool to communicate your identity, not something you have to be prescriptive about. Especially since gender and sexuality are complex and exist on a spectrum — billions of humans have different experiences within their own queerness. You can't expect everyone to fit into tiny, neat boxes, or if you do put them into boxes, you can't expect everyone in that box to have the same experience as you.
Personally, I find this discourse exhausting, maybe because part of me just... doesn't care. Well, my country just labeled LGBT people a national threat and is adding anti-queer curriculum to education, so this whole debate just feels like a nothingburger to me and makes me feel jaded.
Trans men who are in lesbian spaces will not threaten lesbians. Trans women who use the femboy label will not ruin trans women's womanhood. Bisexual women who use the lesbian label don't affect lesbians, because at the end of the day, they're still women who love women.
Maybe I'm just too inclusionist, or just genuinely indifferent about this whole thing. My stance is: I don't care what people identify as, as long as they don't bother people!
It's fine if you're a little weirded out by certain identities (because I am too), but just don't be an ass or act like the identity police toward everyone. At the end of the day, most of this discourse is contained online and gets blown out of proportion by people who never touch grass or interact with IRL queer communities.
We should be mad at the fascist governments that still criminalize LGBTQ people and focus on how governments are still trying to revoke queer rights.